Saturday, April 3, 2010

Back from the wilderness

It was difficult and sad to leave my recuperative solitude, yet it was also time to come home. I did not want to leave, really. All too often, I forget how important it is for me to withdraw from the demands of daily life and just spend my waking hours contemplating and seeking God. There is a rejuvenation that I can receive no way other way, along with insights from and conversations with God on a level that I seem unable to have in the "regular" world. Yet, just like Moses, I could not stay on the mountaintop.

God continues to amaze me in the ways and things He chooses to reveal to me. For instance, having grown up in a city and living in populated areas, I would be lucky to catch a star here and there. In the dark sky unpolluted by lights, you do not just see the major constellations someone taught you (I remember only two, and I cannot even remember how to get to the North Star from one of them!). There are millions of lights in the dark sky, sometimes as if you could see galaxies surrounding some of the stars in the sky.

First of all, I am in awe that my God has the raw power to create this planet, the galaxy around Earth, and space as far as a person can comprehend and some. Every single star in that dark sky was placed there by God, in its position for a purpose. He has the power to place them there! I often forget that He possesses all power and that He is mighty, and I end up treating Him as if He were some genie or divine bellhop.
Then the thought came to me,
The whole universe is not enough to contain You, O God, and yet You love me and You give me personal access to You! Who am I that You show such mercy and grace and favour to me?
Indeed. What have I done to deserve the God of the universe as my adopted Father? Nothing at all, except to acknowledge His Son as my Lord, my Saviour, and my best friend.

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